<TITLE>28. Par 107-109</TITLE>L-107 That's the reason I can't stand to see a cross-eyed child hardly. I seen four hundred and some odd cross-eyed children healed in three months time in my meeting. I've never seen one cross the platform without being healed. And then I think of my little baby. Sometimes God has to crush a rose to get the perfume out of it, you know.
I seen little Sharon, and her little eyes crossing, her little lips quivering. I said, "You know daddy, honey?"
And her little lips quivering like that. I seen her little mouth coming open. I knowed she was going. I laid my hand on top of her like this. "God bless you, darling. You're an angel. You're going to be with mama. Someday dad will see you by God's grace."
I raised my hand, I said, "Lord, I know I've done wrong. But as--as Job of old, though You slay me, yet I love You. I can't help it. I love You in my heart. You're just about to kill me, Lord." But I said, "I--I love You anyhow. Take her, Lord. Not my will, but Thine be done."
Felt like every bone in my body come unjointed. I...?... In a little bit, the Angels of God come took the little thing, took her home. I took her down, and put her in the casket... her mother.

L-108 We took her out to the cemetery. The minister stood there. He took a handful of ash--of dirt. Said, "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, and earth to earth." I heard the ropes squeaking as they let them down. Then like the breeze coming down through them old maple trees, said,
 There's a land beyond the river,
 That they call the sweet forever,
 We only reach that shore by faith's decree.
 One by one we'll gain the portals,
 There to dwell with the immortals.
 Someday they'll ring the golden bells for you and me.
I returned home. I couldn't be satisfied. I could see my wife going, but that baby, how could I give it up? What could I do about that?
My, I went on back to work. One morning I was climbing a pole working as a lineman. I hooked my belt like that. And I was singing up there, working around the primaries. I was singing,
On a hill far away stood an old rugged cross,
The sun was just coming up. That cross-arm on the pole made my shadow on the side of the bank look like a body on the cross the way I looked. "Yes, it was my sin and shame that put Him there. And I was the one who nailed Him to the cross, the Prince of Life."
I said, "O God, but in heaven somewhere, You've got my little girl." And there, I become almost frantic, almost a mental collapse. I took off my rubber glove. Twenty-three hundred was running right by the side of me. I said, "God, I hate to be a coward, but Sherry, honey, I'm... Daddy's coming to see you this morning," as I laid my hand down on that wire.
Why, it broke every bone in my body. How I don't know, unless God had foreordained that this gift should go forth.

L-109 The next thing I knew, I was sitting on the ground, perspiration running off of my face. I took off my spurs, put them in the truck, went down and went home. As I went around the house, I picked up the mail. Went around the house... And few months had passed, turned cold weather, frost was coming up through the floor there.
I wouldn't go nowhere. I said, "We didn't have very much, but what we had..." We--she and I had lived together with it. It was home sweet home to me. I don't care how it was, it was... It was her furniture, and I wanted to stay at home.
When I went in the house, first letter I looked at, Miss. Sharon Rose Branham, eighty cents, Christmas saving. Oh, my, it was all over again.
I knelt down on the floor there. I started crying. I said, "God, please have mercy upon me. I'll take my own life."


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